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When you have everything you can possibly want, there is still something else, always, and it feels like there is no end to this race for happiness. It’s getting tiresome sometimes, but it seems so hard just to stop, and enjoy, and love, and see everything for what it is.

Pour Fred. Il m’a chicané parce que j’écris en anglais dans mon blogue. :)

1/125, f/2,0, ISO 400

Our mind is such an awesome and mysterious thing. During most of our waking state, everything seems fairly simple, but you soon realize that there are so many other ways to experience consciousness. Have you ever made lucid dreams? Dreams in wich you know you’re dreaming? I have these all the time, and I have them since my youth. With time I have learned to not get too excited, because if you are, usually you wake up. You also learn that if you try to have too much control, it doesn’t work either, because then nothing happen. A few days ago, I was not sleeping very well, and then suddenly I started making these lucid dreams, in wich there were no blackouts between my waking state and my sleeping state. It was like, one minute i was lying in my bed, and then, i left my body and entered in this second reality, just like that. It was amazing, and at the same time, pretty scary. I was walking in my dream, very, very aware that I was dreaming and that everything around me was not real. Still, I was touching things, fabric, walls, and I felt it like it was real. It was like doing an experiement in a dream, live. I was walking in the dream, i didn’t feel like I was sleeping, my mind was not sleeping, it was fully aware, resteless, curious. But at the same time, i could not feel my body, and when i felt it, it as like it was paralized. What’s funny is that I didn’t know what to do. Usually, as soon as I realize that I’m dreaming, I fly. But this time I was just there, doing nothing, almost bored in my dream! I remember standing motionless in the dream, just being there, looking around, alone and thinking "What now? What am I supposed to do? Can’t I just sleep and not be here?" I remember walking and then watching everything dissolve around me, diving in darkness, feeling my body changing into water, feeling the waves going through me, and thinking "Hey, what if I can’t get out of here? What if I’m actually dying?" I then tried hard to wake up, feeling far, far away from my body, getting scared, closing my eyes with the strange but very real effort of trying to wake up and make my body move, or rather, make me move into my body. I finally woke up, almost with a headache.

Later I went back into the same conscious dream state. I then tried to meet someone, anyone, talk to someone. At first I was talking to my father, I heard him, but I couldn’t see him. And then, I decided to meet my grandfather. It worked, I went into a room and there he was. I remember telling him that I was his son’s son, that he was not recognizing me because last time we met I was a very young child.

The more I have these dreams, the more I believe there is enormous potential in this state of mind. It an amazing feeling, scary too, but I’m sure that there is a way to be able to stay conscious and make decision while letting the dream go on and lead you too.

Have you seen Waking Life? It’s an amazing movie. When I saw it, It renewed in me this interest for lucid dreaming. I couldn’t believe they actually made a movie about that!

Pony shoes on Viks beach

I have yet to take a look at all the shots I’ve made in Iceland. Too many. It’s kinda nice because I can’t remember all of them, so from time to time there are nice surprises, shots that I took quickly while on the go. I had this feeling with this one I just found. It was shot on the beach of a town called Vik, in the southernmost part of Iceland. There was a great, huge, desert beach made of volcanic black sand and pebbles. I loved the way my girlfriend’s colorful shoes came out on the black pebbles. :)

I can’t wait to have some spare time and make a selection of all the best shots. Maybe I could make a photo album using iphoto. I’ve seen some of them and they are really nice. I’d like to print some of them, get them framed and showing them off in a gallery or a Cafe somewhere. That could be nice. My mother keeps telling me I should sell a book on Iceland, like a coffee-table book. I wonder if it could work?

Publishing a photo book must be expensive.

I guess you are going to see many of them in the future, as I shuffle through them. :) Scattered pieces of Iceland, one of the most beautiful place I saw. Cleary the best trip I have made in my entire life.

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